I guess all my bitching about how everyone was coming over just to eat of our foods and then ditching us paid off.  We weren’t alone when the New Year was rung in (rang in?  came ringing in? ah - skip it!) My friend Sarah whom before NYE night I really didn’t know outside of church small group stayed and played Wii with us and completely kicked our butt in pretty much every game.  I claim it was because of the couple glasses of wine, she claims it’s just because she rocks.  Maybe a touch of both?  Anyway, we laughed and had a great time.  Then she was so awesome to agree to go get our other friends at a different (obviously not “better”) party since she was completely sober.

Then the party began.  Jerm and I rocked out in the living room.  Turns out my air guitar session was a solo with a back up dancer/singer/moon-walking extraordinaire!  Jim and Courtney were in heaven having finally found a species like themselves and were sure to tie that into Star Trek.

I think we wrapped everything up at around 6:30am?  I know the sun was about to rise over the lake.  Anyway, it was a great time and one that I’m sure will be remembered by all.  You know, with the superlative talking, figuring out the woes of the world, and solving all the world’s problems and all.  You’d be amazed how clear things are at 5 in the morning.

Some things we figured out in our deep discussion were men and women can be friends without something going on.  Marriage is a sacred institution that can be awesome but people mess it up sometimes. Jim makes the most awesome ribs ever.  Team maggot now has a mascot and the mock up is hanging on my refrigerator.  Nikka Costa has the hottest bootay going.  Kids make everything better and harder to do.  And The Who is a rock band imitated by many, equal to none.

Before Jim and I had children we talked hours and hours about our philosophies on every aspect of parenting to discipline, to sleeping arrangements, to how to have the “bird and the bees” talk.  We both were adamant, we did not want our children in our bed with us.  This is a topic that has been debated so thoroughly that I could scream but that is not what I am hoping to spark with this.  I am simply saying, for me and my family it is the way it is and the way it works.  Each child goes to bed in his or her bed and Jim and i sleep together in our bed.  It was something that was a bit difficult to establish, especially when I was nursing and getting up every 2-4 hours but we stuck to our plan and it has paid off.

Another thing we spoke about thoroughly and agreed on was to maintain our marriage; to cultivate it like a good gardener cultivates his crop.  We purposely take time away from our children to spend eye to eye in conversations and in love.  I want to show my kids what a marriage is supposed to be like.  I want to model a good relationship so that when they are searching for their spouse they do not settle on good enough.  My mother and father have been married for 43 years but I really never felt they were in love with one another.  I remember seeing them hug a few times but there was no real emotion there.  Every child wants their Mom and Dad to be in love (even if you do not want to think about it - yuck!)  I almost settled on good enough before I met my husband.  I thought the love that you read about, the love that is all encompassing, the love that is so strong it can bring you to tears was simply a fantasy.  I am so blessed that I found my husband and the love of my life and know for a fact that that love does indeed exist.  I want…..need….my children to know that.

Our biggest agreement was that we wanted them to know we would die for them.  That they were the most precious, loved and important people in our life.  But, that the world does not revolve around them nor do we.  These parents who run themselves literally ragged because each child is in 3 different extracurricular activities is an example of what I am talking about.  If there is a show on that we want to watch, we will watch it and if the kids want to watch something else, tough.  You either watch it with us (if appropriate) or go down stairs and watch something else.  They are not at the helm of this ship and I know later in life this lesson will serve them well.  They will not enter this world thinking they are owed something from society or the world.  They must earn it.

Now, I have to say, we are in the infancy of this young family and we have passed several of the tests we knew would come.  I obviously do not have all the answers.  If in 25 years I have one in prison and one still living at home I will say “I WAS WRONG” but at least we have a plan.  It is the most important task God has ever give us, or any person, which is to raise these little beings into productive, happy, healthy and independent people.  Without a plan, I fear we would lose course and make bad decisions.  Do not make life altering decisions by the seat of your pants.  Make a plan and stick to it. Now, if I can only head my own suggestions.

We may be screwing our kids up by the methods we have decided to utilize.  If that is true, we will be ROYALLY messing them up since we plan to homeschool.  Those poor poor kids…..lol

So, being as I don’t have enough to do with raising a 2.5 and 1.5 year old child, going to the gym every day, keeping my house in order, etc etc etc I thought, “Hey, it would be fun to try my hand at CSS (cascading style sheets - Google it) and construct my own blog theme?”  Two days into this and I am starting to think this may have been a bit overzealous on my part.  I have found a theme I mostly like but would like to tweak a few things.  Easy enough, I thought.  Hard work is done for me, I say.  Good God, it took me an hour to move the little “contact” envelope to the left and the “subscribe” to the right so they could be seen and not hidden in the banner.  I have to admit, the sense of accomplishment I felt once I did, was great.  I shouted across the room, “Yes!  I rule!”  Spooking my husband who was lost in his own Internet obsession.

Now there are only a few things I’m looking to change.  But, they can come later and if they never do, so be it.  I just wanted to get back to the real fun of blogging and that’s actually blogging.  Several new developments have happened in my little boring life but I’ll save those for a later post.  Nothing earth shattering but it has altered my life a bit.

Stay tuned and let me know what you think of the new digs!

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

Rules:

Answer each question with one word and tag four other people:

1. Where is your cell phone? Pocket

2. Your significant other? sexy

3. Your hair? showercap

4. Your mother? wonderful

5. Your father? goofy

6. Your favorite thing? laptop

7. Your dream last night? drowning

8. Your favorite drink? sweet tea

9. Your dream/goal? perfection

10. The room you’re in? living room

11. Your hobby? blogging

12. Your fear? loss

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? happy

14. What you’re not? Organized

15. Muffins? Moose

16. One of your wish list items? job for DH

17. Where you grew up? Boonvegas

18. The last thing you did? ate

19. What are you wearing? shorts

20. Favorite Gadget? iPod touch

21. Your pet? retrievers

22. Your computer? Toshiba

23. Your mood? mellow

24. Missing someone? JohnE

25. Your car? Excursion

26. Something you are not wearing? shoes

27. Favorite Store? Target

28. Like someone? Tess

29. Your favorite color? lavendar

30. When is the last time you laughed? today

31. Last time you cried? forgot

It’s hard to just use one word and get your point across.

I tag: Nic, Kim, Moosh in Indy, and SAHW

This is your Mommy….or your Bobby….and I just wanted to write you a letter that I hope some day you will read and know just how much I love you.  You, Sissy and I just got back from a craft day at the park.  It consisted of decorating sugar cookies.  Making punch (Hawaiian punch + soda water) and making candy necklaces.  I don’t know why I continue to try to make you do things you obviously think are silly and not fun.  I just keep thinking, “Maybe this time he will sit still and actually do this.” and of course I am wrong.  I just want you to know I am trying to do the best I can for you.  If what you need right now is just to run out all this energy and explore new things, I am going to make it my mission to make sure that happens.  I will turn down things (for now) that require sitting and being passive for things that are more involved and active.  You are such a smart little boy and I have to remember you are a different human being from me.  It is hard for Bobby to remember that sometimes.  I feel like you are a part of me….just an extension of myself and am shown otherwise time after time.

I love your personality, your hugs, your smile, your voice, and especially how you sing “Twinkle Twinkle wittle sta!”  I will do my best to make you into a good man.  A man any woman would be blessed to have as her husband.  I will strive to create in you a love of God, learning and family.  I will mess up….that is a given…but know that every minute of every day I am TRYING to make you the best of who you are….whatever that is.  I want to help you find your gift.  The gift that was given to you by God and develop that so that in your life and work you can feel fulfilled and happy.  If that happens I will feel that I have done my job and done it well.

I’m sorry if I get frustrated when you run from me.  I’m sorry if I spank you and you don’t know what the spanking is for.  I try to explain to you that you can’t run from me or the “cars will get you” but wonder if you just think I’m just mean sometimes.  I hope as an adult you can look me in my wrinkled eyes and say, “Thanks Mom….you did a great job and I have had a wonderful upbringing.”  If and when that day happens, it will be the best day of my life.

I love you my little Jack Jack.

Forever Your Biggest Fan.

Bobby

I’ve lived in this little, sleepy, wonderful town for almost 5 years and just last summer I made what I would call  “life long friends.”  Not that I didn’t try before now but it’s just not as easy as I remember it in school.  Remember the days on the playground where you would see a new face and see that person as a potential playmate?  A wonderful new adventure to be bestowed upon?  There were no thoughts of rejection. There were no fears.  Just happiness met with fun.  I wish it could be like that once the reality of human relationships is learned.  But, we all know, it’s not that easy any more.  I thought once I found my husband the nervous, “Will they like me?” feeling waned.  But, no, it is just as hard when looking for a true friend. One in which you can just pick up the phone just to chat.  One that you can call just to say, “I’m bored, let’s do something” and hear a cheerful, “Ok!” in response.  One you can count on.

First is the daunting question; where do I find such a person?  It’s not like I can just go to the park and approach a woman, is it?  I know! I’ll join every social club, group and support clique I can find.  That surely will yeild results.  Or maybe just someone I see at the grocery store?  What happened in my life is all of the above.  I met Tess at a breastfeeding support group at my local hospital.  It only met once a month and it is really hard to even learn peoples’ names in that short amount of time.  Then I would see her at Wal-Mart with her kids.  I would say “hi” in passing but then would be like, “what was her name?”  The response in her eyes said she had the same questions.  Then I saw her at the park.  Again, “Hi” we would say but never anything more.  Finally after months of this I finally got up the courage and started a conversation with her and admitted I didn’t remember her name.  The relief left her face as she admitted the same.  From that point on we have been great friends.  We had more chemistry from the start than I had found with many of the other “friends” I had made at church or other areas.  Our kids are best friends as well and we know we can count on each other for a laugh, something to do on a boring Monday, and a sweat tea from McD’s.

Tess and her kids

I have since learned that Tess is a friend in which I can always count on an honest answer from.  The woman knows everything about everything!  Seriously! If I mention how I have a birds nest above my deck she knows how to keep that from happening (plastic snakes).  How to keep flies away at an outside picnic?  (Ziploc bag full of water with a penny in it setting on the table).  How to make homemade play-dough?  How to knit?  Where to find the best deals on just about anything?  How to make a DVD of your kids’ pictures?  What are the good shows on TV?  How to keep a house clean AND have two children and a husband?  The list goes on and on.  It cracks me up when I hear her say, “I just feel like I don’t have it together.”  I look at her and think, “If you had it any more together you’d be mayor!”

Meet Courtney :)

It was through Tess I met Courtney.  A shy woman with so much unknown beauty.  If she could just see what everyone else sees, she would be so much happier.  A woman so shy she avoids situations she really loves.  Yet, everyone around her is thinking, “What does SHE have to be worried about?  She beautiful, sweet, smart, kind, a good mother, and a wonderful sense of humor.”  But, inside of her she thinks people are thinking, “Look at her, she’s gained weight.” or something of the kind.  This girl can make me laugh so hard.  She doesn’t even try most of the time but her mind works a little different than mine so she’s always surprising me with what she says and I love it!  She’s crazy in love with her kids (like all good mothers are).  She keeps the cleanest house I’ve ever seen.  To a fault at times probably but that’s who she is.

These two women aren’t perfect which makes them perfect friends for me.